June 5, 2010

Hate: Hiding Behind the Veil of Anonymity


I spend a bit of time every day on the various internet-based meeting spaces – my blog, Facebook, Twitter, and email. Since becoming more active on the internet, I’ve seen a lot of hate spewed and regurgitated. I expect it in the mainstream media. It’s kind of their job these days.

I also expect to see hate being shoveled out in comments on media sites as they invite readers to weigh-in on the various stories and topics. The idea of being somewhat anonymous and spouting things you’d never say if someone could identify you is a very well-known psychology phenomenon. But, I’m just shocked at the brazenness exhibited by readers who hide behind some random user name so they can spit flames and hate in the comfort of their own home.

But I’m starting to see more and more people come out and publicize their hate. I don’t like it. I’m all for freedom of speech and for speaking your mind and all that openness stuff. It’s the outright hate, defamation, belittling, and blatant hostility toward others that make me bristle. It’s everywhere these days, and so prevalent on many online social networks that it’s no wonder I have quite a few friends who refuse to move more into the online world.

Many people believe that hate is the opposite of love. Couldn’t be farther from the truth. Years ago, CycleGuy was explaining this to me as I struggled with intense negative emotions I have toward specific people (one day I’ll get to that story, but not now). I so wanted to hate them and wish every negative thing upon them. That was until CycleGuy started in on the psychology of emotions.

You see, hate really does nothing for you. Sure, it may make you act in a certain way or say certain things. And while it may make you feel better for a short time, it really only eats up your heart. A friend of mine told me awhile back that I can’t drink poison and expect someone else to die. WOW! Of course not. But that’s what hate is. Poison.

It may sound all pollyanna and happy zen kumbaya not to dwell on hate. Sure, it’s easy to say I don’t harbor hate. I don’t though. Well, I try not to. Somedays it doesn’t work so well, but generally I don’t do the haterade. Instead, I move toward general indifference. It’s emotionless. It means something doesn’t matter. I give it none of my time, energy or emotion.

I choose not to fill my life with hate. And I don’t like it when it’s heaped upon me or my friends by anonymous or semi-anonymous people hiding behind the computer as if you can’t see them. Oh, we see you. We may not know your name but we see you. I choose to ignore you, hater. Like I said, it doesn’t always work. But I try hard not to allow hate to get in me. I don’t let it work its way to my mind or else I get sucked in to that underworld of ugliness.

Don’t get me wrong, there are people I don’t like. But I choose not to dwell on them. I decide what I take in and put out, and Hate is not one of them. Hate ties you to the past and doesn’t allow you to see the greatness that is before you. By not allowing hate to overtake me, I grow stronger each day.

I leave you with this quote by Booker T. Washington: I shall never permit myself to stoop so low as to hate any man.



Honey June 5, 2010 at 11:35 am

Hi Sara,

I agree with you about not wasting energy on hate. There really is no point. It does not enrich your life in any way. I don’t understand how some people can spend so much time and energy hating other people and making sure the rest of the world knows about it.

Thank you for your post today. It is a reminder to put our energies into things that will benefit us and those around us.


Michelle, Muffin Tin Mom June 6, 2010 at 8:07 pm

this my friend is an excellent post.

you put it so well “I can’t drink poison and expect someone else to die.”

Sara June 6, 2010 at 8:38 pm


Thank you for stopping by and for leaving a comment. I appreciate your tweeting about my post as well.


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