March 7, 2010

I Want To Be A Kid Again … Wanna Try Too?



There are days I don’t like having to be an adult.  Too many responsibilities, not enough play time.  Honestly, there hasn’t been a lot of play time in my life.  That’s just how it went.  And some days I regret having to be the responsible one so early in life.

As a kid, I did get to do all kinds of your typical kid things — play outside, ride my bike until dark, look for frogs and tadpoles in the drainage ditches, typical stuff.  But I also was expected to be ‘mature’.  My mom worked and went to school and so I lived with my grandparents for awhile.  And living with grandparents has its pros and cons.  One of the biggest cons is that they already raised their kids and weren’t really wanting to deal with a precocious 7 year old on a daily basis.  Grandparenthood contemplated short bursts of time, not full time child care.  There were lots of pros too, and I truly benefited from many of them.  The cons, though, were pretty significant.  At least to me they were.

Which brings me to wanting to be a kid again.  But not a kid in the 70s and 80s, a kid now!  Kids now have all kinds of great opportunities to have technology and learning and the entire world at their fingertips.

One of the pros of living with my grandparents is that they traveled extensively and had lots of very cool things from all over the world — figurines from Japan, papyrus from Egypt, games from Africa and China, and lots and lots of slides.  Yes, I said slides.  Those negatives of images sandwiched between a tiny frame which are then loaded into special viewers and accompanied by stories of ‘When I was in …..’  They brought a much larger world into my view.  They provided food for my learning.  The stories and images gave me the possibility of being about to go and do anything.

When I was a kid I had lots of responsibilities, even though my mom and grandparents may not have intended it to be that way.  I was the responsible one.  I had to make it all right.  I was the fixer.  If something went wrong with me or my brother I had to fix it.  The consequences were too harsh (in my kid-sized mind) not to ‘fix it’.  So, from early on I’ve been The Fixer.  If something had to be done, I would do it.  I’m just tired of being The Fixer.

I want to be a kid again.  I want to just ‘be’.  I want to dream and pretend and sing silly songs and wear crazy clothes (and not be seen as a candidate for the crazy bin) and eat whatever I want without thinking about fat or carbs or diet.  I want my mind to be free to wander and not keep going back to that pile of laundry, list of emails that need answers, bathrooms that need cleaning, grocery shopping, errands and the never-ending list of professional momhood.

I want to get back to those times of pure joy.  When ice cream seemed like a very logical choice for breakfast since it’s made of milk.  When who was ‘it’ in tag and where to throw the ball in kickball were the most important things I had to remember.

I didn’t have a lot of childhood and I want to try and make up for that.  So I have a plan — but it’s kind of an adult’s version.  First I’m going to read a book by Kevin Carroll.  He was the keynote speaker at Blissdom, the blogging conference I attended in Nashville last month, and he was phenomenal.  No, he was more than phenomenal but I don’t know if there is a word for that.  Kevin-Tastic!  Yes, he was Kevin-Tastic!  Because I don’t really know how to be a kid, I’m in need of some help.  What’s Your Red Rubber Ball is the perfect book.  In this book, Kevin (I met him so I think I can call him Kevin) talks about finding your passion and turning that into your lifetime of happiness.  He encourages grown ups to make everyday life a playground and have fun.  That’s what I need — to go to the (virtual) playground and just have fun!

I need to find my Red Rubber Ball – the one thing that drives me.  Drives me to be my best.  Drives me to do my best.  Not for anyone else.  Only for me!

What is your Red Rubber Ball?  If you’re not sure, join me in reading Kevin’s book What is Your Red Rubber Ball.  (it’s a short book)  I want to inspire you to be happy and live passionately and filled with happiness.

What do you do to find the joy in each day?

Note:  The link to Kevin’s book is an Amazon affiliate link.  By clicking on the link and buying the book, I will get a few cents.  Hope that’s OK with you.

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