July 18, 2011

Mamavation Monday: Being Comfortable In My Skin


Barbara Seville photo - All Rights ReservedBarbara Seville (image by me!)

I’ve never really felt comfortable in my skin. When I was 8 I was told I should watch what I ate or I’d be fat. A stranger said that to me. And here I am 30+ years later and still remembering. And still watching.

I didn’t tell my mom because I didn’t want to make my mom feel bad. She was overweight and I didn’t want her to think I was ashamed of her or that her struggle would become mine. As a mom now, I have a sense of what she must have felt as she tried diet after diet to lose weight.

The one thing I wish I’d taken from my mom was her confidence. Although she was a plus-size, she wasn’t defined by her size. Mom mom was confident and truly loved life, helping people, being with her family and friends and enjoying each day. And while she was sometimes slowed by her weight, she was never embarrassed by her size.

I was so afraid to gain weight. When I was a teen I watched The Karen Carpenter Story with my mom. She love Karen Carpenter. At the end of the movie my mom turned to me and told me that other people will say things about you all your life, sometimes you just have to ignore them.

I’m not an ignorer. I’m one of those who files it all away. I wish I could just ignore what people have said to me, especially when it comes to my weight. Weight is such a weird obsession. There is a fixation on thin in Hollywood that is perpetuated every day. Celebrities are airbrushed to perfection.

I have to say, though, that I have some amazing women friends who, even though they don’t know it, are role models to me. They are comfortable in their skin. It’s not something we talk about, but I can see it on their faces when we meet. It’s how they walk, laugh and enjoy.

Being comfortable in my skin is something I continue to work on. Some days are better than others. And recently, I’m having more of those better days!

Are you comfortable in your skin?



Resa July 18, 2011 at 2:36 pm

It is SO hard to let people’s mindless comments slide sometimes, but it’s just part of the territory of being human, and especially of being female. Keep working on making those days better – you’re already doing wonderfully!

Elizabeth July 19, 2011 at 1:57 am

It’s funny you should say this today, because my mom just said that she admired how comfortable I am in my own skin and wished she could be like that. I’ve had to learn self confidence, I’ve relied on myself from a young age. I think it finally carried over to feeling like I’m as okay on the outside as everyone else, and that was probably at about age 40. Maybe by then you realize it’s okay not to look like a supermodel!

Laura July 19, 2011 at 6:33 pm

It’s crazy how one off the cuff comment by someone who doesn’t even know me can stick with me foreverrrrr. I hate it, but I’m glad to know I’m not alone!
I’ve always felt like I had to have a larger than life personality to ‘make up’ for being larger than life. As I’m getting older and more focused on being healthy instead of thin, I’m finding I like myself more and more and gaining quality friendships. Slowly but surely I’m getting comfortable in my own skin. It takes some work, but we’ll get there! 🙂
Have a great week!

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